This blog post is going to be a different kind of blog post.
In addition, I am shocked that I am going to use it to be my second blog post back at it on here.
I have learned, experience, and am dealing with things this year I never thought I would deal with and some of them are the reason I have not blogged since January and some are not. Am I going to share all of them with you all? I honestly do not know. Am I going to pick up blogging right where I left off? Heck no. I blog for myself and it is time for me to use it for not only a creative outlet but an all-together outlet. Mom and travel bloggers out there blog because they want to share their experiences and of course other things and that is what I want to do here I want to share my experiences and share the creative side of my brain. Because my work does not allow me to do that.
So I am starting with something I have learned about myself personally over just the past week or so. It is still hard for me to wrap my head and heart around but it is something I feel I have to come to realization with. And that my friend is how ones actions come off to other people. I never knew until this job that I can get short with people, maybe even rude. I can also talk down to people especially when I am frustrated. Moreover, I am definitely not saying I thought I was an angle before but I never knew how much of it came out of me. Through out high school and even college I was a shy person who never really spoke her mind unless you were one of my super close friends. Through the years, I have let that blunt person come out and I had loved it. I loved speaking my mind on certain topics but now I am learning it may not be that great of an attribute.
Its hard for someone who was also characterized as the shy, quite, too nice girl to be told you talk down to people and we don’t want to deal with you after a tiring time because of the way you act. I never thought I would be that person. So now I find myself stepping back, keeping my mouth closed, and being that closed off shy person that some people may have called a bitch. Yep I just said bitch on my blog. I told you new things are coming. But that is who I came off as.
So why am I sharing this with all of you and why did I repeat myself in the beginning of this post. That is because I am one, some who likes to repeat everything and two someone who wants to break down some walls that I have built up. Though I have just come to realization, full realization, about this part of me it is time to also realize that though I have these moments they do not and will not truly define me. I am accepting that part of me that does not mean that I am not willing to change it.
I feel like life is about learning and changing and sometimes you learn about yourself as a person and sometimes you have to take that knowledge and create something or change something for the better because of it. Even if it means you have to accept that, it is a fact. Because the one thing you have learned does not define you. It can make you a good or bad person. It can even make you a great person if you can enhance it or overcome it. As human beings we must learn to accept the things, we cannot change and learn the things that we can change. Through the past few months, I have had to overcome these thoughts and create these changes. I do not know if I am truly and hole heartedly succeeding but I am making the effort to improve and making the effort to be the person that I thought I was.
Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. – Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, 1986